Mark Gregory: The Reluctant Action Star

            God, I love Italian exploitation movies. This point was made markedly clear once again when I got my greedy hands on the new Severin Blu-ray release of Adam and Eve, a truly bonkers 1983 Bible-sploitation flick which had the inspired nerve of mixing in two cute nude stars (beginning in the idyllic Garden of Eden) and then throwing in dinosaurs and cannibals.

            The film also had me marveling at the career of one of the film’s stars- Mark Gregory, who was featured in several post-apocalyptic action films from the 1980s before completely disappearing. The more I investigated the more I realized his story was a truly a sad one, with rather brutal twists and turns. But one had to admire his fierce individuality, bravely walking away from a career he never wanted to begin with.

            There are varied versions of how Mark Gregory was “discovered.” On the Blue Underground Blu-ray/DVD set of 1900: The Bronx Warriors there is an interview with actor/stunt man Massimo Vanni, mostly known for playing the comic sidekick of foul-mouthed Inspector Giraldi (Tomas Milian) for several movies directed by Bruno Corbucci. On the disc extra he takes credit for seeing the incredibly tall, long-haired, angelically handsome, bodybuilder at his local gym and describing him to director Enzo G. Castellari (The Inglorious Bastards), who was having a devil of a time casting the lead for his upcoming dystopian action film. Massimo cornered the muscleman at the gym (whose actual name was Marco De Gregorio) and invited him for a private casting session with the director. But Marco complained that he had a date with his girlfriend then and wasn’t sure if he could make it. Massimo kept impressing on Marco what a golden opportunity this was but it still took plenty of pleading to get him to show up. Of course, Castellari flipped when he saw him and hired him on the spot.

            1990: The Bronx Warriors (1982) (Blue Underground Blu-ray/DVD) “The lucky ones were the first to die!” screamed the ads for this ludicrously enjoyable, shameless rip-off of everything from Escape From New York to The Warriors to Mad Max. It’s set in the future- “1990,” where the Bronx is officially declared “No Man’s Land.” The authorities steer clear and the area is ruled by The Riders. Ann (Stefania Girolami), the 17-year old heiress of a shadowy, arms-dealing business called The Manhattan Corporation purposefully escapes into the Bronx and is taken under the protection of Trash (Mark Gregory) the motorcycling leader of The Riders. A psychotic mercenary named Hammer (Vic Morrow) is hired to venture into this lawless closed off part of the city and bring Ann back. 

            Meanwhile there are warring factions in the Bronx like the roller-skating, white-helmeted Zombies, the underground dwelling Scavengers and dapper leader of the Tigers called the Ogre (Fred Williamson) who all have their own agendas. Christopher Connelly (Peyton Place) plays the truck-driver known as Hot Dog. The film ends in a bloody massacre perpetrated by the loony Hammer (Vic Morrow). Mark Gregory with his long, curly locks and pouty lips looks the part. Riding his motorcycle his musclebound torso fitted with a leather vest makes for a stoic, handsome, rather incongruous, hero. His high-waisted designer jeans feel slightly out-of-place, not to mention his strut, but he is dubbed with a thick, stereotypical “New Yawk” accent to make him seem tougher. 

            But he does get the satisfaction of killing Hammer and dragging his body behind his motorcycle down the bombed-out Bronx streets. This was the first of three movies director Enzo G. Castellari directed in an amazing 6-month period on location in the Bronx and other parts of the city. People don’t realize what an actual scary hellhole the Bronx was at the time. Luckily the director hired the Hell’s Angels to be in the film for protection and Castellari cleverly pulled neighborhood gang members off the streets to help with the film. 

            Escape from the Bronx (1983) (Blue Underground Blu-ray/DVD) In this laughably loony sequel, the government is ordering people to leave the Bronx (and sign up for “a new house in enchanting New Mexico”). The area has been declared uninhabitable and destined for demolition. The ones who refuse to relocate, like the homeless, are eliminated with flamethrowers. Trash (Mark Gregory) is a loner selling stolen weapons to the survivors. He is also targeted and shot at from helicopters. Even Trash’s parents are burnt alive by the “Disenfestors.” Henry Silva plays Floyd Wrangler, the sadistic, sneering, ex-prison warden in charge of the demolition squad. Trash’s parents’ brutal immolation causes Trash to seek revenge by enlisting other colorful underground-dwelling gang members. 

            He draws in a crusading reporter Moon Gray (Valeria D’Obici) and a whacked-out mercenary named Crazy Strike (Giancarlo Prete) (and little psycho son Jr.) to kidnap the President (Ennio Girolami) of the “GC Corporation” but it all ends in bombs and poisoned gas that results in very few survivors. Jr. says to Crazy Strike “Pa. Let’s go back down. I don’t like it here at the top,” and they retreat underground while Trash stays above ground with the streets littered with the dead. Mark Gregory is less stiff in this one, and looks cool wearing a brown leather jacket and a tee shirt with a picture of snakes winding through a skull.

            Adam and Eve (1983) (Severin Blu-ray) According to Italian exploitation logic, in their interpretation of the book of Genesis, God created man in the image of a rocker from a 80’s heavy metal album cover. Yes, tousled-haired, pouty-lip beauty Mark Gregory stars as Adam, who carves out of sand the first woman ever- Eve (blonde, beautiful Andrea Goldman, who never did another film after this trash classic). They frolic naked in the idyllic Garden, playing with the animals and splashing around in the ocean. But then that pesky devil snake talks Eve into eating the forbidden apple and sharing it with Adam and they are banished from the Garden.

             That’s when the movie veers far, far from Sunday Bible Study Class. Adam and Eve fashion loincloths to cover their nudity and wander across deserts arguing with each other. Eve steals a large egg from a nest and a raggedy giant bird attacks them. They kill and shred the bird, eating its guts, using the new skins to make more fashionable loin cloths and off they merrily go. They are attacked by a group of hairy, growling cavemen who carry them off to the rock caves. “Maybe they’re not as nasty as they look,” Eve says as they then fondle Adam and Eve’s private parts out of curiosity. A man-eating tiger attacks and Adam and Eve escape and head towards the sea. Eve wanders off alone and is captured by a long-haired, green-painted savage who drags her back to his pack, tying her up and hiding her in his lair, offering her raw bird intestines to eat. Adam desperately searches for Eve while a hairier, simian looking tribe attack the green people. 

            Adam comes to the rescue and ends up witnessing the green warrior fight off a man in a hilariously bad bear suit. Eve chooses to stay with Adam and they don animal skins to survive the cold while the theme song “My First Love” (sung by Tania Solnik) thunders over the soundtrack. They finally do reach the sea and Eve gives birth to a “cub,” by squatting in the ocean. Words fail to describe how fabulously deranged and spiritually stupid this movie is.

            Thunder (1983) (aka Thunder Warrior) (Amazon Prime/Tubi) Mark Gregory plays a Navajo Vietnam War veteran named Thunder (“Grandson of Night Eagle”), who returns home to his girlfriend Sheila (Valeria Cavalli) only to find a construction company destroying the sacred graveyard of his ancestors. He brings a Government Treaty to Sheriff Cook (Bo Svenson), but he is too busy bitching about a toothache to help him. Officers banish him from town, a jeep full of racist thugs tie him up and drag him across the desert and then then he decides to come back, steal a bow and some arrows from a local store and take the law into his hands, Rambo-style. (To be perfectly honest I’d rather look at Mark Gregory’s face than at Sylvester Stallone). 

            “They should stay on their reservations,” one hateful old biddy says as they are shoving Thunder into the back of a police car. Directed by Fabrizio De Angelis who was obviously fond of endless slow motion car crashes. Thunder races off in a pickup and hides out up in the mountains where he fights off cops and construction workers hunting him down and promises to make “Little Big Horn look like a Boy Scout Jamboree.” A radio DJ named Dancing Crow turns Thunder into a folk hero. My favorite scene is when Thunder puts on war paint, steals a bulldozer, heads into town and smashes right into the police station. Some of this was filmed in Monument Valley, Utah.

            Thunder 2 (1987) (aka Thunder Warrior 2) (Amazon Prime/Tubi) Long-haired Mark Gregory is back as the Navajo Vietnam War Veteran- Thunder, looking even more beatific, who returns home and battles a bunch of bikers in a diner hassling a family just trying to have lunch. The same creepy cops from the last film falsely arrest him but are shocked to discover he is now a Deputy Sheriff assigned to their precinct. Bo Svenson returns as a more upstanding Sheriff this time around. Thunder’s now married to Sheena (Karen Reel), who is pregnant and soon to give birth. Drugs are rampaging through the Native American community and corrupt Deputy Rusty (Raimund Harmstorf) is in cahoots with bikers who are supplying the drugs. 

            Thunder has a wild fight in a warehouse with a wig-wearing transvestite, chases a group of rifle-toting bank robbers (showcasing more of director Fabrizio De Angelis’ love for slow motion car crashes). He is railroaded by Deputy Rusty, who plants drugs in his locker. Thunder is sentenced to 5 years of hard labor in prison. (Why he is chained shirtless in a metal cage on the back of a pickup while he is carted off to State Prison is a mystery for the ages). Then we get to see him hosed down in his underwear by the mean head guard nicknamed Hyena. After back-breaking work in prison loading pipes onto a truck, he is beaten and put in the “sweat box” as punishment. But nothing can break Thunder, who earns the respect of the other prisoners. Thunder grabs a shotgun, steals a police car and escapes from jail (even flying the car over the barbed-wire fence). It’s time for him to put on a headband, drape his body with ceremonial necklaces and paint his face for all-out war. Go, Thunder, Go! The end of the film is a truly WTF moment.

            Delta Force Commando (1987) (Tubi) Directed by Pierluigi Ciriaci (under pseudonym Frank Valenti), this lame action film is about some Latin American terrorists who strike a U.S.A. army base in Puerto Rico and steal a nuclear device. During the deadly attack, they kill the pregnant wife of Lt. Tony Turner (Brett Clark).

             Mark Gregory cuts those long, curly locks of his to play a bad guy- the scarred-face leader of the terrorist squad. He’s even the one who brutally mows down the expectant mom with a machine gun. Captain Beck (Fred Williamson) and Tony illegally commandeer two planes and heads to Nicaragua in pursuit, on a rogue mission. “I’ll find ‘em,” Tony vows, “For my wife. And for the baby I never saw.”  Bo Svenson plays no-nonsense Colonel Keitel, head of the Delta Force who suspects something funny is going on about this stolen nuclear device. Plenty of machine gun and grenade kills for video game enthusiasts only.

            Thunder III (1988) I’ve had difficulty tracking down the third in the trilogy, also directed by Fabrizio De Angelis, but Mark Gregory is back getting revenge after some rednecks burn down an Indian village, murdering the horses and almost killing a child. Not to mention giving Thunder a vicious beating and once again dragging him behind a vehicle. He gets no help from the local sheriff (John Phillip Law) and gets revenge by targeting the businesses of the perpetrators, blowing them up big time. Werner Pochath plays the loathsome town leader.

            Missione Finale (1988) (aka Ten Zan: The Ultimate Mission) (YouTube) An ill-fated co-production between Italy and North Korea with a cockamamie plot about mercenaries kidnapping young women from villages for bizarre experiments where glands from exotic animals are injected in the women to change their chromosomes and genes. It’s some scientist who wants to create a master race (oh Christ, not that again). 

            Mark Gregory plays the main bad guy Jason, who is dressed in military fatigues and is flown into villages by helicopter where he picks the best women to be kidnapped. “Final Solution Research” organization calls in a commando- Lou Mamet (Frank Zagarino) from Mattituck, Long Island to help get the bad guys. Lou’s partner Rick (Romano Kristoff) has a woman he considers his “sister” Mavi (Kim Follet), who is abducted and Jason takes a shine to. There’s a plot twist later on that makes no damn sense at all. Lots and lots of boring explosions but Mark Gregory does have a good, long, death scene. The film never even opened in Italy.

            Just a Damned Soldier (1988) I haven’t been able to find this one either. It stars Peter Hooten (The Inglorious Bastards) as a mercenary who leads a 4-man team into Cambodia to steal a cache of gold. Mark Gregory is one of the crew in this action film directed by Ferdinando Baldi (Texas, Adios/The Sicilian Connection).

            Afghanistan: The Last War Bus (1989) (aka War Bus Commando) (YouTube) Mark Gregory begins the film scaling down a mountain in Afghanistan to rescue a fellow soldier held prisoner. Gregory plays Johnny Hondo, who looks really great in cap and fatigues blasting away the bad guys in this major kill-a-thon. Then we are suddenly in Montana with Johnny hunting rabbits, visited by John Vernon (Animal House) as Ken Ross, who calls Johnny back to Washington to the bedside of his dying General dad. His father begs him to do a suicidal mission back in Afghanistan to regain his honor. It’s about a school bus with all these official documents hidden in it that needs to be recaptured. Johnny meets up with a ragtag squad that will help him on this mission. 

            He parachutes into the country and meets an Afghan boy who can speak English and they travel by horseback to free two captured American soldiers- Captain Bowie (Mario Novelli) and a mechanic Sergeant (Bobby Rhodes). Johnny even finds the bus (supposedly with the documents) but he finds they are now stranded behind enemy lines. They all get the school bus working again and fit it tank-like with bullet-proof panels to make a great escape across the border. (I kept praying they would go all Ken Kesey and paint the bus with all sorts of psychedelic designs and painted sunflowers). To be honest, the movie isn’t half bad. This was Mark Gregory’s swan song as an actor, and it’s rather bittersweet because he had actually turned into a rather compelling action star.

            After that film, Mark Gregory walked away from movies. His passion was painting and he intended to throw himself fully into it. From all accounts he was a kind, sweet soul, and unfortunately, according to some accounts, he became the victim of a financial swindle which cost him his house and possessions. He gathered up his guitar and luggage and fled Rome, moving to a small village- Castel Madama, (19 miles outside of Rome), where he led a quiet reclusive life. Fans searched for the actor for years (and there are plenty who fanatically loved his films). Even director Enzo G. Castellari joined the hunt for the elusive star. No one in Castel Madama had any idea of his film career but he must have cut such an odd, eccentric figure walking through town. But his demons finally consumed him and with a mixture of psychotropic drugs he ended his life in 2013 at age 48. Because he died penniless, the town buried him in their local cemetery with a simple wooden cross with his name and birth and death date. 

            I have to admit finding out what happened to him stung. I would rather imagine him shirtless, painting his face for war in one of the Thunder films. Or beatifically wandering nude in the Garden of Eden with blonde and beautiful Eve. Or scaling down a mountain in fatigues to save a captured soldier in War Bus Commando. But especially with his flowing long hair, wearing a leather vest, riding his motorcycle through the bombed-out streets of the Bronx in another crackpot Italian sci-fi schlock classic.